Zoeller's comments no laughing matter
By Cathy Harasta
The Dallas Morning News
(KRT)
DALLAS - Masters' champion Tiger Woods should have a field
day choosing the menu for the 1998 Champions Dinner next spring:
"Fuzzy Fricassee," "fried Zucchini a la Zoeller,"
"and green Jell-o to cleanse the palate."
By virtue of his victory at Augusta National, Woods, 21, gets
the privilege of selecting the food for the annual dinner held
each year prior to the tournament. Do not expect the entertainment
to be provided by Zoeller, a past Masters champion who had better
hang onto his day job, considering how he fared as a comedian.
A self-described "jokester," Zoeller has yet to tell
us what was so droll about his recent references to Woods. Zoeller
has apologized for calling Woods "that little boy" and
suggesting he not serve fried chicken or collard greens at next
spring's dinner.
But where was the punchline?
Zoeller's tenuous attempt at racial stereotyping for grins
suggested the worst kind of bunker mentality.
And where was Zoeller this spring when the backlash hit others
after they made ethnically and racially insensitive references?
John Calipari called a reporter a "Mexican idiot"
last month, casting the New Jersey Nets coach in a bad light.
The NBA fined him and Miami Heat radio announcer David Halberstam,
who made an imponderable reference to slavery in Jeffersonian
times while broadcasting a game.
In amplifying the obvious, the PGA pronounced Zoeller's statements
inappropriate and offensive. So far, no fine has been assessed.
Zoeller, sensing how far south his image was headed, made an
act of contrition Wednesday. Struggling for control of his emotions,
Zoeller withdrew from the Greensboro PGA stop, citing the distraction
he had caused.
A day earlier, Kmart Corp. announced it was ending its sponsorship
of Zoeller, whose remarks had caught the attention of more than
Kmart shoppers. When he bowed out at Greensboro, Zoeller, who
has not been able to reach Woods for a one-on-one conversation,
acknowledged how damaging the comments had been. He expressed
his regrets for the distraction he caused the "world of golf."
Said Zoeller: "I started this, and I feel strongly that
I have to make things right with Tiger before anything else."
Woods, the youngest Masters champion, is the son of a Thai
mother and an African-American father. Tiger, who said he invented
the term "Cablinasian" to describe himself, scorched
a course conquered by Zoeller in 1979, when Fuzzy won the Masters.
Zoeller might have aimed his jokes at himself.
Woods re-invented the Masters. And that's no joke. Tiger endowed
the event with a new dignity. Zoeller proved some people will
grasp at any old stereotypes, which, unfortunately, keeps them
alive.
Surely, Zoeller could have found more suitable material in
his drive to make people laugh. Some of the shots at Augusta that
week made you double over. The big names who missed the cut might
have made a catchy spoof. The greens, however, were funny only
to those who didn't have to go near them.
Or perhaps Zoeller could have engaged his wit in public service,
warning about the hazards of using the stairs at Greg Norman's
residence, where a misstep sent President Clinton to the knee
surgeon.
Weak stabs at comedy based in stereotyping an individual just
don't cut it. No one in the group present when Zoeller delivered
his one-liners appeared overcome by any perceived brilliance in
what he later said were comments made "in jest."
Zoeller has lost a sponsor, pulled out of a tournament in which
he had played 21 consecutive times, hurt his sport and made himself
miserable.
But he also gave everyone food for thought by serving as a
reminder that offensive comments will not be taken lightly. They
will not be taken with a grain of salt. They will take down the
speaker.
If Woods ends up forgiving Zoeller, Fuzzy probably still will
find it hard to forgive himself for trying to get a lousy laugh.
The "joke" hurt everybody.
(Cathy Harasta is a sports columnist for the Dallas Morning
News. Write to her at: Dallas Morning News, Communications Center,
Dallas, Texas 75265.)
(c) 1997, The Dallas Morning News.
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