Earl Woods has learned much, too
By Blaine Newnham / Seattle Times
SEATTLE - Experience.
Earl Woods got a second chance at being a father and, with
the world as witness, made the most of it.
"I was prepared," he said on Thursday. "I knew
right from the start what I had with Tiger. He was so special."
Woods was in Seattle to give a talk for Pacific Institute,
the motivational people. He entered and left the Convention Center
to a standing ovation.
Along the way, he talked about his son as his best friend,
about a relationship that turned forever on a single discussion
in a room with no interruptions and no bounds.
I wanted to know why Earl Woods wasn't like any other stage
father. How his crusade with his son for greatness was different
than that of Marv Marinovich, whose son, Todd, became a casualty
of what turned out to be myopic madness and, finally, drugs.
Or any number of zealous tennis parents whose kids were finished
with the sport before puberty.
"Most of you don't know that I had a previous family,"
Woods said. "He (God) gave me a sorry wife and said 'Let's
see how the sucker handles that.' "
Not well, as it turned out. The former Army Green Beret lost
the battle with his wife and three children.
A kinder, gentler father fashioned a second family with Kultida,
his Thai wife.
"I couldn't care less if Tiger was a great golfer,"
said Woods, who appears to the world to have dedicated his life
to making him one. "Tiger was not raised to be a golfer.
He was raised to be a person.
"He is a better person than he is a golfer. That's scary,
but it is the truth."
Although golf was dad's idea, the passion for the game is Tiger's,
according to Earl.
"He doesn't like it, he doesn't love it, he's addicted
to it," he said. "We came to peace with that and it
was OK."
Tiger has said more than once that his father didn't force
him to practice or play.
Earl talked about their relationship, graphically viewed around
the world as the two embraced after Tiger's victory in the Masters.
"Tiger would tell you in a heartbeat that I am his best
friend," said Earl. "We've always been best friends.
There was no period in his life when the hormones raged out of
control and it was different."
But why?
"I've always come from truth with Tiger," continued
his father. "When he isn't in a truthful situation, he is
ill, physically ill."
The two developed a communication strange to most fathers and
sons, but then Earl was older, more mature, and learning from
his mistakes.
"We had a room in the house where we'd shut the door and
talk," Earl said. "Not about what I wanted to talk about,
but what he wanted to talk about. And we'd talk as long as he
wanted to.
"He'd ask 'What's the integration policy of Australia?'
Or 'What's this I hear about male menopause?' I didn't know the
answers but told him I'd try to get them. I made myself vulnerable
and human. I earned his respect as a friend."
One of those discussions came after Tiger, 9, had played poorly
in a tournament.
"I never judged him," said his father. "My mother
(who died when Earl was 13) told me 'Never judge anyone, we have
a Man up there who does that.' But I asked Tiger why he had hit
the shot he had on No. 4.
" 'Because that's what I thought you wanted me to do,'
he said. I told him, 'Tiger, you play for yourself, not me. You
can do what you want on the course. We'll talk about it, we'll
discuss it, but you are free.'
"That was the defining moment in Tiger's life. He understood
he was free on the golf course."
Earl was asked Tiger's goals.
"I don't know, they're Tiger's goals, not mine,"
he said. "I can assure you one thing, they are a lot higher
than any of you imagine. Tiger didn't dream about winning the
Masters, he dreamed about winning all four majors."
Earl holds to his conviction that Tiger can change the world,
that his hold on youth equates to incredible power, and that golf
remains a perfect metaphor for teaching people to play by the
rules, to have integrity, to control one's destiny by making choices
and being responsible.
But can he be a champion as well as a crusader? Will one take
away from the other? Earl says no.
"He's 21 and has the God-given talent no other golfer
in the world has now. He is going to get better and better. If
you think he's reached his peak, I've got news for you."
Now that sounds like your normal Little League father, which
Earl Woods isn't. He learned better.
(Blaine Newnham is a sports columnist for the Seattle Times.
Write to him at: Seattle Times, 1120 John Street, Seattle, Wash.
98109.)
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